"it's so bad. It's like, I'm in sexual limbo right now" (...) "he said i looked worried. Well of course I did, because i didn't know what i was doing! If I had LOADS of experience, then I would have had like, a normal face. No actually i would have had a face of "what the fuck are you doing, do you need some help??"  ----- 

"oh my god, look at the size of those carrots" "wow that carrot is bigger than my boyfriend"